Tuesday, September 18, 2007

the times they are a changin'

My good friend and colleague Bob Dylan wrote a song with the same title as that of this blog, and I'm not sure that it really has anything to do with this entry, but that's ok, because Bob Dylan isn't really my friend and colleague. But I can say with absolute clarity that it has been entirely too long since I've released the flow of brain juices onto this page and just let a few thoughts out. That may say one thing or many about what's been going on lately.
It may suggest that I've just been way too preoccupied with other forms of entertainment and life stuff to be able to continue on in the world of blogotry. But, it may also suggest that I just haven't had any thoughts rolling around this abnormally large head of mine.
I fear the latter may be more true than the former. I'm sure most people as they roll through periods of life may experience some lack of depth of thought, as a writer may experience that dreaded thing known to me as "writer's block".
Well, since I'm not really a writer, I can't be blocked from something I'm not, but I do feel as though my mind has not been as sharp lately as it has been in the past. It's as if there's a cloud over my head and rain falls wash away whatever may have been growing inside of my mind.
This may be attributed to more than one thing, but for the most part I think I'm just tired in the mental form of the word. My mind is exhausted, as are my heart and soul. There's a good explanation for that, I've cut myself off...
I have lazed about my days, lacking the discipline to return to a true 'comfort zone', where I learn and am fed by the God of all things. Many times I've taught and spoken the message that in order to not only maintain, but build a relationship with your Creator, you must spend time with Him. I think I've fallen prey to the predator of many in the pastoral profession, busy-ness.
Such is a pace that I have no desire to maintain or even support in my life. There are times of rest needed in everyone's life. When they are missed, they are dearly missed. And it's not meant to be a race of disproportionate means, running as hard as possible until you can no longer breathe, rather it is meant to be a steadied pace, with which anyone can keep up. Saving the energy for the final stretch, but keeping a constant speed to maintain a healthy heart rate.

Going too hard until your body, mind, and soul are crushed under the weight of imbalance is in no way healthy and will destroy in the end. That's why people tire, fade, wain in their strength. I'm not to the point of no return yet, there's still time for me to carry too fast of a pace and too heavy of a burden for a while. But I don't want to, nor do I intend to.
I have come to a conclusion, that I need to be careful, with time and energy. With resources and availability, with what I put into everything, and with what I take from others.
It's all a matter of remaining steady at a maintainable pace, I think I need to slow down, just a bit.

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